Now I'm All Messed Up
by BlueTights
Summary: Oliver goes on a mission, alone. While on it...something happens back home with the Team..will Oliver be able to redeem himself and figure out how to make it right. In the process, will he end up finding, literally finding true love or will he mess it up, again?
1. Chapter 1

Hello beautiful Olicity shippers! I am now on your team as well! Ahhh man...I also ship Densi and Captain Swan. This is my first Olicity story. I really hope that you like it! I have been requesting to have a video or gifs made to Tegan and Sara's, "Now I'm All Messed Up" unfortunately there was no luck. But that's okay because it gave me a plot line in my head for what I think may be a pretty decent story! I hope you stick around. I do not own anything! ENJOY!

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It was a dark evening in the foundry. Storming. The thunder rolled through the building above and even shook the walls below. The rain pounding as hard as ever, Felicity swore she could hear it, even down there. It was quiet. So not only could she hear a pen drop, if it was of course to drop but she could definitely hear the raindrops. The door above swung open and then shut tight. She heard footsteps coming down the stairs. She swiveled around in her chair only to see Oliver Queen standing at the bottom. Soaking wet.

"Hey…John wanted me to let you know…" She began before she was suddenly cut off by Oliver stepping more into the room.

"I know." He nodded solemnly. "He told me." John had called him two hours before letting him know of the sudden death of one of his old friends from the service and how he had to be at his funeral the next day. The funeral was off in his buddies home town, 14 hours away. Driving or flying, Dig knew he needed to get out that night to arrive in time tomorrow to pay his respects.

Solemn. That seemed to be the word as of late. Sadness. Confusion. Unsettled. Unstable. Since Sara's death only a few weeks before, eveyone kind of kept to business and kept to themselves. Felicity ached as she tried little by little to reach out to Oliver. Whether it be a small touch, a smile, maybe a little longer than normal stare. Something that would let him know, reassure him that she was not going anywhere.

He walked to the table and turned to lean against it. He took out an envelope from his jacket pocket and slowly opened the paper letter. It had gotten wet from the storm so he was extra careful not to rip it.

"What's this? Business for tonight?" Felicity said as she made her way over to him, placing her hand on his shoulder playfully.

"Whatever this is...it's pretty cryptic. A letter? Who sends letters anymore?" She asked as she eyed the paper a little more.

"Whoever sent this, says they have information on Sara.." Oliver began as he looked at Felicity with a tightness to his jaw.

"Oliver, Sara is dead." She said as she moved her hand down to grasp his arm. She rubbed her hand down his jacket then shook off her hand as his sleeve was slopped with water.

Without even thinking Oliver walked to the other side of the room opposite of Felicity. As he did he could feel her looking at him with confusion and insecurity bubbling up in her face.

"They could know something we don't, her killer. I know I watched her die but it can't….that can't just be the end." He said, tears crossing his eyes, only for a split second.

"Oliver. I know there is still some part of you that blames yourself...but you need to let it go. She is gone." Felicity said as gentle yet as forceful as she could. Her heart broke as she saw the sparkle of hope rise in him concerning something that was so long gone.

"Felicity! She was dead once and came back! So, sure the first time wasn't my fault, I guess..." He shook his head and slammed his hand down on the table, "But this time...this time I don't know, I…." he regretted his tone the moment he used it.

"Oliver," she cut him off, " you saw her. She is dead. I'm sorry but she is dead. It was not your fault. You didn't stick an arrow in her chest. Yes, we should consider taking leads into her killer, but Oliver we need to wait until John gets back, for proper protection! You can't just throw yourself into this alone, it's a suicide mission! And I…this letter...it could be a trap, someone might be trying to bait you, bring you out of hiding, something. I don't agree with you doing this alone, I don't support it. You cannot let your emotions cloud your judgement." She took one step closer to him. This was so out of character for him, she didn't know how to handle what was happening in front of her.

Oliver clinched his jaw and pushed everything off of the table. Felicity jumped back. Her heart broke for him. But her insecurities blossomed as well. She thought she was his #1. She thought that things had changed for him...that what he had said...all that he had said..she thought that he loved her. Her logic told her that he was just overthinking everything and it was all just hitting him, at once. But sure enough her emotions told her that he wasn't over Sara and that's why he was doing everything in his power to go redeem her, even if only her name..and to get revenge and fight. She knew they had been through a lot. Even after the break up, when Oliver started acting different towards Felicity..she knew that they would always have that special bond and even though Felicity thought of the Lance girls as sort of friends, in a way...they were...she would never reveal to anyone, a bit of a threat as well. Regarding her and Oliver, of course. And good goodness. Felicity rubbed her hand against her forehead, was she really being jealous right now, of someone who was dead?

"Come on Felicity, Get it together." She whispered to herself and pushed on her dress.

Oliver ran his hands through his hair and began to walk over to his Arrow suit. Felicity tried to play everything off.

"So what business are we attending to tonight?" She said trying to be giddy and lighten the mood.

"I am following up on this letter Felicity. They provided an address and I am going. I have to find out what they know, if she was targeted by someone I, we know, if it was random, if I could have..I...if…" Oliver began as he began packing up his arrows.

"No." Felicity suddenly was right in front of him and shoved him back. "No, I'm sorry but no Oliver, you can't just go and do this. Especially, John isn't here and I am not letting you go out there alone. Oliver, I know you must be hurting and I get it you want revenge but this rage that I see...I...I haven't seen this in a long time...You're in too deep and if it's a trap, you are gone and maybe that is just what this person who sent the letter wants. Oliver, please. What are you going to do then? Oliver. I am not telling you to forget about this, lets sit and do some research tonight...we can follow the lead this weekend. Is there something more to this, why you feel like you have to do this alone? Just talk to me...let me in...what are you thinking, what is this really about? If it was about her, and all about clearing names and getting justice, you would be fine with doing this in a few days, with John. so . up? " She shouted as she glared him down. She could see his face, blank, not willing to let her in.

She turned around and her ponytail flew and brushed his face a bit.

"Why won't you talk to me? I...you, Oliver, you told me that you loved me. Me. So I am sorry but the way you are acting...it's as if you are still in love with her. You still love Sara. Even if she is gone and I...I am standing right in front of you..." Her eyes teared over and her heart broke as he turned to walk away, she called after him, "Go...Go...Go, if you want, I can't stop you!"

 _Please stay_

He stopped right before he got to the stairs, "I have to do this." He climbed back up the stairs the way he had just entered just a few minutes before.

She stumbled back and plopped into her chair. She buried her head in her hands and let a few sobs escape.

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Please Read and Review!

(So it was brought to my attention by a lovely reader that at first I was writing pretty unrealistically since Oliver buried Sara himself. I watched Seasons 1 and 2 on Netflix and only caught up on Olicity really, with some other character undertones on Youtube. Though, I am typically known for writing plots for characters a bit on the unrealistic side, I don't want to have my plot timeline just flat out wrong, so I went in and I changed up the first chapter. So, sorry from here on out if I get something confused concerning story timeline. Although I think now that I have made that small adjustment it will be better now. Thank you for reading and I hope you all still read since I changed it!)

xoxo-Bluetights


	2. Chapter 2

Hello readers! I wanted to let you know I changed the first chapter because I got a very kind review letting me know it was pretty unrealistic and even though I enjoy some unrealisticness...I don't want to completely mess up the plot line just because I made a mistake, so it is changed! Please continue to read and **review**! I am excited about this story! Please put in recommendations or anything you want to see, I am totally up to try and work in some of your ideas! Thanks for reading!

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Felicity walked up the stairs. One foot at a time. Slower than normal. She turned over her shoulder and turned the lights off for the night. She closed the door behind her and walked through the club to the door. The club was closed that particular night for repairs. The storms that had been in the area the past few days had blown a fuse. No lights upstairs. Felicity stopped at the door and looked around the club for a moment. A small grin slipped to her face as she allowed herself a moment of fantasy. Before their first date was well, ruined..she babbled on to Oliver about how one night they need to just come out from the bottom and dance and sing at the top of their lungs to Taylor Swift and Oliver just laughed and shook his head. She then remembered him specifically asking, "Why Taylor Swift?" as he just smiled and laughed with her. She told him that her songs were specifically written about her life. Taylor Swift, sure is mainstream but she is just too fun. He agreed. One night, they would come up and sing at the top of their lungs to Taylor Swift. They would say hell with it, and just do it. Just have fun, together and not care who was watching. Felicity pictured them across the room jumping with the imaginary crowd, drinks in hand and sure enough singing at the top of their lungs. Oliver was in his classic Oliver Queen suit and Felicity well, she was wearing her pink dress and of course, panda shoes (the comfiest to dance in).

She then sighed and looked down at her shoes, not panda but blue heels. She then looked back up and no one was there, not a single soul. Lights were out and she could hear the wind howling from outside. She opened the door and the wind threw it shut behind her. She was so worried about Oliver. She was feeling confused and a bit insecure and she knew there was only one way to make it to the morning without Oliver. 'Oh man' she slapped her forehead and said to herself, "Now even my thoughts are not how I mean for them to sound. I'm going to the store." She looked around, jumped over the puddle and looked across the street before she made her way to her car.

The rain had calmed to a drizzle but the wind was still picking up. She popped into a convenience store on the way back to her place and picked up some Ben and Jerry's and then continued on her way. She pushed her keys into her door and kicked her door open. She turned her light on and put down the grocery bag on the counter. She spied something from the corner of her eye.

"Flowers?" She asked herself as she made her way to them. They were sitting on the coffee table by her television. There was a card sticking out of the flowers and suddenly she looked around and smiled a little.

"Oliver always finds a way…" She whispered as she picked up the card. She took a stem out from the vase to smell it and suddenly began feeling really strange.

"Oli...Oliv.." She choked before she had landed on the floor, passed out.

The card flew open on the ground and it was signed, well not by Oliver. Not by Oliver, at all.

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The rain picked up again, strong around 3am. Oliver was driving back to the foundry. He hated the way he left things with Felicity. He did. He did just tell Felicity that he loved her and then he was acting, what, like that towards her? He couldn't believe he did that. That he treated her that way. Even if he wanted nothing more than to get total revenge for Sara and even if he would always have Sara in his heart...she was his past and Felicity...Felicity he knew was his future. Of course that is if she would ever forgive his uncalled for, outburst. He couldn't believe the way he acted. Especially after showing up at the address and never getting out of his car. He knew she was right. It could have been a trap. He could have been killed all because what? He didn't exactly know what took over him. He did, He did hold himself to blame for it, a bit...but moreso, what he wouldn't admit to himself was that he couldn't protect her and if he couldn't protect Sara who was once a woman he loved, how was he ever going to truly protect Felicity. He felt like he needed this closure, he needed to make sure he brought her killer to justice, he found the information, he took care of it, alone...to redeem the fact that before, he failed. He felt as though he needed to do this to represent to himself that he would never ever let anything happen to Felicity. It was the fear. His fear got the best of him. As he drove back, the windshield wipers flew back and forth as hard as they could and it was getting hard for him to see. Luckily he could see the club in the short distance and pulled his car to the side. He opened the door and ran into the building. He slipped a bit on the floor inside from the puddles right outside the door but as he caught himself he just smiled because he knew Felicity would have some smart, hilarious comment for him at that very moment. He flew the door open to the foundry and found the lights off. He ran down the stairs.

"Felicity!" He called. He looked around and she was nowhere to be found. He took out his phone and dialed her number. Voicemail. Oliver got it. She was giving him the silent treatment. Sure, it may have been immature. But he was being just as irritating earlier, and for him to just storm out and not deny or confirm her statements. He was being immature.

"Damn it, Felicity." Oliver ran back up the stairs and before he reached to turn the lights back off he remembered the fern. He decided to go and pick up a new one. To represent this new stage with them. Him promising her to never be that stupid again. To never walk out on her again. He decided he would drop it off at her place. Sure it was late, but he, he had to apologize now. He ran to the 24-7 mart down the street. Open 24 hours. It was right next to the late night restaurant open for 24 hours, he would frequent it as his previous identity, Oliver Queen, billionaire and playboy, also drunk cravings, a MUST at 3 in the morning. He doubted they would have plants but as he drove by, sure enough he saw some hanging in the front. Oliver parallel parked and ran in.

"How much?" He pointed to the fern in the front.

"No sale." The man said, not necessarily saying he wouldn't sell it, just simply saying, it was meant for decor and that was it.

"Please sir. How much?" Oliver pleaded and pointed to the pots. They swung from their hanging pots in the wind and suddenly one flew down. The soil pouring out a bit on the cement. The man looked at Oliver and then pointed at the plant on the ground, "Sold." The man said and chuckled. Urging Oliver to take the fern that was now no good use to the store owner anymore.

"Thank you. Thank you." Oliver bent down and scooped some soil back up into it. He smiled at the fact that when he would tell Felicity how he got this fern, she would find some metaphor. Like, they were broken and yet it was a sign from the Universe or God that there was still hope for them. A grin reached both sides of his mouth. He tucked the fern into his front seat and began his drive to her place.

He made the way up the stairs. His hair, his clothing, everything. He was soaking wet, but Felicity Smoak was worth every drop. He went to knock on her door and saw that it was cracked open. He gasped quickly and dropped the fern to the concrete, it shattered.

He opened the door, "Felicity, you okay? Felicity!"

He walked in more and saw the flowers on the table. He walked over confused. Felicity was nowhere in sight. He saw the grocery bag in the kitchen and checked the bags. Melting Ice Cream. This was not good. He then went to the flowers and right before he reached for the stem he stopped and picked up the white card at his feet.

He opened it and to his surprise it said, "You took the bait. Signed, Yours Truly Love, P."

"No! NO! NOO!" Oliver threw it across the room and sank to his knees. As he dipped his head into his hands the door flew open in the wind and the lightning lit up the sky to highlight the shattered fern on the porch.

"Felicity...I will find you." He growled.

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so tell me what ya'll think and if you have any theories! Thanks dears!

:)


	3. Chapter 3

Oliver called Diggle immediately upon making the discovery that Felicity was kidnapped. John let him know that he would be on the next flight back to Starling City. Oliver entered the foundry and threw his things down. He kicked the table leg and made his way to the computers. He sat down in Felicity's chair and began researching all he possibly could on this said person who signed their name as "P".

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Felicity opened her eyes and she was sitting in a very dark room. Looked like a basement almost. The basement had cement walls and looked more like a dungeon, she thought. She then looked in front of her and as she squinted she realized there were tv's set up all around her. She wondered who and what in the world captured her, but more so she wondered if Oliver was alright. She hoped that this was involved in the letter he had found so hopefully the only bad thing that had happened was her getting kidnapped and that would mean that he was alright. She breathed in a bit and her stomach rumbled. She was so hungry. She heard footsteps above her but she was so stuck in the chair she couldn't get out even if she tried. Her feet were tied to the chair as well as her hands fastened. She tried to turn around as best as she could as she thought she caught a glimpse of the staircase. She didn't like it one bit that the staircase was behind her. She didn't like not getting to look her attacker in the face. She wanted to be ready and unfortunately he had the upper hand in this kidnapping. Felicity suddenly became very frustrated. She couldn't help but think about how annoyed she was at Oliver. She wasn't sure of anything at this point; his safety, his love, his plan, the way he was viewing anything. She didn't like it at all and just decided to sleep a little while. It was sure very uncomfortable but nonetheless better than sitting up, still and being forced to overthink.

Suddenly the tv screens all came on in front of her. Felicity jumped and gasped in her chair. She looked from shoulder to shoulder, "What the hell?" She whispered to herself and looked at the big screens in front of her, they were so bright.

All of a sudden the screens showed another chair. This time in a bedroom. Another moment later, a woman appeared on the screen. She had red hair and a light complexion. Her makeup looked like a Kardashian. Felicity's expression showed confusion and a bit disgust as she had no idea what was going on. If the tv's were going to show someone, I mean couldn't it be someone like hot, like maybe Oliver? Felicity would have slapped her forehead for that comment if it wasn't for her hands being chained to the chair.

The woman sat in the chair and cleared her throat to introduce herself, "Hello Felicity, I am so glad that I had the opportunity to meet you, or you know steal you away. Haha," The woman then smiled and went on, "You see Felicity my name is Penelope, Penelope Irving...but you know, most from my town know me as Poison Ivy...but your friends...they will know me as Lo. See, my identity unlike your charming beau's is a complete mystery to this city and you know, I don't even really have to tell you my motive...because wouldn't that just be cruel. I will just let you know the facts, darling. I have these wonderful pheromones and you know they just make people susceptible to mind control and manipulation...shame really, Laurel looked like such a sweet girl, but also so easy to manipulate, oh and she will lead me right where I want to be. Right into Oliver Queen, oh I mean, The Arrow's arms of course. Once Laurel convinces him to trust me, why that's when the fun will begin. See, my lips,"

She touched her lips with her finger seductively and then continued, "they have this awesome ability to poison anything they touch. I'm sorry Felicity. You are smart and in love and I knew I couldn't have you around while trying, oh, I'm sorry, succeeding at stealing your man. Except, when I kiss him, everyone will know the outcome. You see, it's actually been really fun taking out every single one of my ex lovers partners. He had so many, but you know, I never really get tired of this. You may say, well he didn't even help him for very long, just one mission"

She said in a whiny voice imitating a little girl who didn't get her way and continued, "but one is all it takes, Ms. Smoak."

She talked so seductively and manipulative and oh it drove Felicity mad. She shook in the chair and screamed, "No..Oliver!"

She knew no one of value could hear her but she couldn't stand sitting still after learning of Poison or Penelope's plan! Tricking Laurel, Seducing her Oliver and then killing him? All because she was out for some love struck revenge. Felicity could not let that happen, yet she had no idea how she was going to get out of this.

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The next morning came and the next and the next. Penelope was sending someone in a mask down every morning and evening to let Felicity relieve herself and give her a small meal. It was obvious that Penelope wasn't trying to kill Felicity but simply trying to get her out of the way. Which was equally annoying to Felicity. Felicity kept thinking about the mind reading and each time she began to fear that Oliver would be fooled, she breathed and assured herself that he was smarter than that and wouldn't fall for her. Felicity tried to come up with some sort of plan but she knew the facts, physically she wasn't strong enough to fight the man who came down in the mask but she knew that she was smart enough, like Poison said and she decided she would use her brain, she just wasn't totally sure what that looked like yet, but she would find out.

After the man put her back in the chair Felicity noticed a tattoo on his wrist while he was tying her back in. As he tied her in the tv's got bright again. She showed up on the screen. Penelope was only doing her makeup but Felicity knew that if the tv was on, it was probably because she had something big planned today and at that time Felicity knew she had to act.

"Um sir, there...that heart on your wrist...it's broken..Have you...have you been in love before?" Felicity hoped that this would be some kind of Evil Queen and Huntsman type story. Maybe she had been watching Snow White too often (she loved the dwarves, especially sneezy) but she really hoped that there was a chance that could be real. Why else was he the only one that she had on her leash, that worked for her, that came down every night and morning to check on Felicity and do Penelope's dirty work? As she asked the question he looked up at the tv screen with tearful eyes and then back towards Felicity.

He tightened his grip on her wrists and she squealed, "Mind your own damn business." He grumbled back. She nodded her head quickly and heard his footsteps disappear.

"Phew, I was right….Thank you Snow White! " She whispered to herself. He was completely in love with Poison, and for some reason she didn't kill him. She just kept him around, maybe he was a friend, maybe an ally, maybe her love, she wasn't sure but an idea popped into her head on how to get out and she was going to do it.

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Three days. Three going on four and Oliver felt like it had been an eternity. He shouldn't have ever walked out. He shouldn't have left her and especially he shouldn't have left her without an, 'I love you', but he did and he had to keep that in the back of his head, to make sure he made it up to her when he found her, because he was going to find her. Him and John had been looking and looking for someone with motive in Starling City, they even checked out Central and still nothing. He knew he needed more help. He picked up his phone and dialed.

"Laurel, hey, I uh, I need your help can you meet up?" He asked her over the phone.

"Ollie, I'm actually working with a client right now but I will meet you at 3 over at the coffee shop off Main?" She said, a woman crying in the background.

"Yeah, um sure thing." Oliver hung up the phone and went back to researching with John.

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"Sorry about that Lo," Laurel said as she hung up her phone. "Now tell me more about what happened." She said as she gently put her hand over Lo's.

"I...I was attacked by a man...and I couldn't see his face. I..I wasn't raped..but...bu...he beat me, I just...I just want to see justice brought to him, and I don't...I don't know where to start or who to trust..or even who will believe me, and trust...trust in me. I don't want this happening to other woman, and I don't want the innocent men getting hurt, only...only the guilty ones. The thugs who think it's okay to do this to women!" She said as she wiped her tears from her eyes.

"Lo...I believe in you...and I want to help you. I...I think I have a friend that can help you and also I think I can find someone to represent you and we can get justice, okay?" Laurel peered into her eyes and smiled.

Lo smiled, "Okay, yes that sounds perfect. Thank you, Ms. Lance."

"Oh...Lo! Call me Laurel and did you want more coffee with your crescent?" Laurel asked her as Lo dusted the napkin against her lips, catching only a bit of her green tinted dark lipstick.

"No, I am fine thank you, Laurel. I really appreciate your help. I must be going, the shipment of my lipstick comes in today, I have it specially made, you would be surprised how many supermarkets don't have my shade." She smiled at her as she stood up to leave.

Right as Lo walked out of the coffee shop she crossed paths with Oliver, and she simply smiled at him, throwing a blink his way.

He did a double take and noticed her green lips, he didn't know that girls wore that shade, goodness.

"Laurel, I need your help." Oliver began.

"Good, because I think I could use your help as well. The men on these streets have gotten worse again, and are wrecking and damaging women. You can't let them continue this." She said, pleading with him to help her have eyes on the situation that had taken over their city.

"Does this have to do with your latest client? Green lips? Isn't that a little odd? Who does that?" Oliver played.

"Oliver, this is serious." Laurel pleaded with him again.

"Laurel, I'll put eyes out but I don't know how I am supposed to bring her justice. How do I find her attacker? That is a job for the police….man if only you knew a cop. Oh wait….." Oliver said a bit snarky towards her.

"Oliver what is the matter with you? You seem more irritable than normal." Laurel questioned him as she sipped on her black coffee.

"It's Felicity." He whispered.

"Laurel, someone set up a trap for me, was trying to pull me out of hiding and instead they were just baiting me...they took Felicity. It's been three days, Laurel. Three days and I don't know if she is okay and I don't know where she is and hell, I don't even know who took her! I just…" he clinched his fist, "I just need some answers. They signed their name as P, do we know anyone with that name or last name or...anything?" He asked Laurel.

"I….Oliver, I am so sorry. I...I don't know. I can't think of anyone but if they are on the streets and picking up women, sounds like it may connect with my case. You could always meet with Lo, and maybe work with her and see if she can remember anything about her attacker." Laurel placed her hand on Oliver's and looked up at him with concern.

"Alright…" He said relunctantly as Laurel turned around to yell for another cup of coffee. He spied the napkin with the lipstick left on the table and decided to take it, just to do a small check on Laurel's new friend, Lo. Even if he was wrong about his gut feeling that something wasn't right if a beautiful woman was wearing green lipstick, he couldn't take the chance. He remembered Felicity's small comments at that moment. Her small comments of, "Oh my gosh, why is she wearing that when she is a TEN?!" He grinned a little at the thought and knew he had some searching to do.

"Laurel, I gotta get going. Thanks for your help I will let you know if I find anything about the wild men in the city. Keep me updated on Lo's case, would you?" He asked her and she nodded.

"Yeah, no problem. And Ollie…" She reached and grabbed his arm. He looked down at her. "We are going to find Felicity." He nodded and walked out of the coffee shop.

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Guys, how am I doing? Do you like it so far? Please review! :)


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